Do you?

It’s Friday night. The beloved day of the week you have been wishing for since Monday. It’s what got you through wearing that same pack of obnoxious, mustard yellow Old Navy masks during that 3 hour class of yours. And then doing it the next day, and the next day– oh wait, and the next day. And yet, it’s finally here. And yet, I am still unamused.

It’s all too strange. Times are weird. Your glasses fog up because of that crusty old–let’s face it– probably unwashed mask. I’m saying it now, but you probably heard all these trite statements mentioned on the news for the 60th time this week. Or, from that person you-don’t-see, but-do-see at the grocery store who abruptly stops you while you’re just trying to plop a bag of avocados in the cart and run away. Or, from your middle-aged neighbor who simply shares a hackneyed photo stating “wear a mask” on Facebook.

And then there’s the stories I wish I didn’t have to share or even necessarily think about. A somber conversation with your grandparent, your brother, your mom, telling you about a PERSON, a human, a sheer life has been deflated. Yes, some minor. A fever. Congestion. All due to your inflated, utterly, stupendously, outrageous, superior point of view. Though, if you would like to question me on this… feel free to send me a DM.

And why am I typing this word press post in my bed on a Friday night? It’s because I am fearful, fearful not solely for the foreign Zoom access codes that I struggle to connect to (Shoutout to my lagging internet connection) or the stress I succumb to on a daily basis as your average nursing student. No, rather for the lives I come in contact with daily and the potential patients I could come in contact with. This. This my friends, is why I am sharing.

I want to go to school. Actually, go to school. I know, I know. Cheesy, right? I genuinely love the magic–if that’s what you call it– of sitting in class, of seeing humans, of glancing at the blue-light projector sitting in a row of desks next to my bestest buddies. I’ve always been the strange, giddy, enthusiastic kid ready for school (guess some things never change, huh?). I genuinely want to see a patient during clinical, smile without a mask on to an ill patient. I want to share a huge smile where you can actually see my teeth– in a not so creepy way.. Actually communicate without having to awkwardly say “WHAT!??” after not hearing a remark I easily should have heard the first time.  I want to be able to have skin without tiny red bumps gathered at the corners of my mouth…. or as I like to call it “mask-ne”. (Get it.. it’s like acne under your mask).

I hear what you’re saying. I really do… but I don’t. I don’t think you’ve heard the perspective ~yet~ from a overtly, concerned college student’s perspective. I don’t want to see your outrageous “banger” over Snapchat nor do I want to see the entire Luzerne county gathered in the back of your tiny 6×6 foot backyard. No. I want to see you wear a mask, a mask over your face– yes, including your nose. Please…?

Though I cannot say I have been diagnosed with the virus nor I have been personally victimized by the fricking virus (yes… I am @ you COVID-19), I have utter concern and care for those around me.

I wear a mask for the betterment of those around me. I wear a mask to (hopefully) continue my college education for greater than a month, to feel the pang of my eyeballs burn from staring at a screen for my IN PERSON classes, to relentlessly foster the relationships amongst my peers + clinical instructor+ my professors+ of course, my best buddy roommates.

I wear a mask.

Do you?